Saturdays are generally the stupidest and deadest days on the interwebs. So, here are some Twitter links to hopefully make this Saturday—in what a few years ago used to be a vibrant academic blogosphere but is now more like a post-apocalyptic desert—a little less stupid and a little more alive.
When I looked at the tweets I bookmarked over the past couple of months, it turns out they’re mostly poetry (so much poetry!) and levity. It’s amazing how much better reading lots of poetry makes me feel; I highly recommend it, like looking at greenery or eating home-cooked meals. I deeply apologize to all artists and humanities teachers and scholars on behalf of all my haughty and dismissive STEM brethren. Absence of the arts or humanities from one’s life is its own punishment.
Dead Poets' Society: We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion.
Medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But pic.twitter.com/JFhI7ScObY
— Yamamba (@Yamamamba) July 31, 2021
#StanLee pic.twitter.com/yG2YQnnT9k
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) August 17, 2021
Without further ado, links! In two groups! If you’re not into reading poetry, scroll down for levity.
POETRY (and a smattering of SHORT PROSE)
Thank you so much @BarrenMagazine for giving this poem a home. It’s a bit out of season, but out of season feels so appropriate right now 🌱 pic.twitter.com/PrWXmO0c4L
— Sam DeFlitch (@sdeflitchy) August 21, 2021
Here is a poem that I think about a lot at the beginning of the school year. It is my response to the nihilism I sometimes feel when I think about why we're learning math, proving theorems, drawing graphs, in *this* world. I love you.https://t.co/2gtymgimhF
— Dr Spencer Bagley ☀️🏳️🌈 (@sbagley) August 20, 2021
How did I miss this poem by @charles_jensen in @AmPoetryReview?!!
Um, blimps!! “A group of blimps/is called a fantasy” ❤️ pic.twitter.com/Dp0DDzQSxZ
— Kelli Russell Agodon (@KelliAgodon) August 20, 2021
A forever favorite by Kim Addonizio pic.twitter.com/wNuU7GHZL1
— Leila Chatti (@laypay) August 18, 2021
And this (full poem here: https://t.co/oSxSIaXWHe) pic.twitter.com/Z81Cw2VjN8
— Rhiannon L Cosslett (@rhiannonlucyc) August 17, 2021
And this pic.twitter.com/AZxatHBqps
— Rhiannon L Cosslett (@rhiannonlucyc) August 17, 2021
Re-reading this one today. Song Dynasty poet Lu You (1125-1209), translation by Kenneth Rexroth. “And all the sadness of the/twilight of my life is gone.” pic.twitter.com/f9Mc6SV2qj
— Vanessa Fogg (@FoggWriter) August 13, 2021
Still thinking of this poem: pic.twitter.com/hSrNlDQuAp
— Maya C. Popa (@MayaCPopa) August 12, 2021
Has to be among the best divorce poems ever, right? Right up there with this one. pic.twitter.com/6hcGcnFgm0
— Justin Rigamonti (@jrigamonti) August 9, 2021
Who shared this @maggiesmithpoet poem the other day? I sent it to three friends and they all replied “Damn.” One way to know a poem works. pic.twitter.com/g56yzLHDFt
— Justin Rigamonti (@jrigamonti) August 8, 2021
You know who knows how to do a sex poem? @doriannelaux that’s who. pic.twitter.com/KQmC9RCg0e
— Dr. Lacy M. Johnson (@lacymjohnson) August 7, 2021
i have nothing to contribute to the bukowski discourse other than that "bluebird" was a very important poem to me as a young person & young poet and i think it very much still whips pic.twitter.com/c6EQ0YEA4H
— nicole (@nicfegan) July 24, 2021
i cried writing this. happy summer pic.twitter.com/2LT4CFtQkl
— yena sharma purmasir (@yenapurmasir) June 28, 2021
just hit me that she was talking my story in @havehadhavehad, which features actual dollies, not toys. so if you want to check out a story that an environmental lawyer from memphis said was "not bad," here's your chance: https://t.co/eFk2ldWfvX
— kyle r seibel (@kylerseibel) July 27, 2021
A cheating husband drops his marriage down the drain in this short story by Pedro Mairal, translated and recommended by Jennifer Croft. https://t.co/yGPIjZcxg8
— Electric Literature (@ElectricLit) July 29, 2021
grateful that @OcqueocSAM saw this title in her queue & said "yeah, this is a thing I'd like to publish" https://t.co/AES2T7JPYt
— Meghan Phillips (@mcarphil) August 4, 2021
LEVITY
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) July 6, 2021
My son sends: “How they do the Dewey Decimal in Maine.” Real books get the red balloon, @StephenKing 🎈 pic.twitter.com/fGOgQ7UXoJ
— Meg Gardiner (@MegGardiner1) July 6, 2021
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) July 7, 2021
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) July 10, 2021
Human amphibious vehicle entering a private submarine tunnel. We have yet a lot to learn about their technology. pic.twitter.com/gvjG8acale
— Aliens About Humans (@HumansExplained) June 27, 2021
F* this song pic.twitter.com/PZSWW7gfSd
— Tom Cardy (@Tomycardy) July 6, 2021
— socks magocs 🤙 (@RottenTunaGames) July 11, 2021
A collection of me turning into random objects. pic.twitter.com/ValPdPNJIj
— Kevin Parry (@kevinbparry) July 13, 2021
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) July 14, 2021
“I used to think,” says Lin, exhaling smoothly, “that Tyler and I were made for each other. We’d climb into a rowboat with a bottle of wine, and he’d row us out to the middle of a lake, and then we’d measure the depth of the lake — sometimes in metric.”https://t.co/O8EJBYyD9e
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) July 15, 2021
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) July 17, 2021
this lamp is haunting my nightmares pic.twitter.com/nEqB93AFcC
— tyler (piglet enthusiast) (@tyler_posting) July 18, 2021
"If you’re a dedicated member of the community looking for a group where you can make a difference, this job is not for you." https://t.co/mwUy0SNvSY
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) July 19, 2021
"She’s not the perkiest assistant, but I’ve had her for almost five years now and I’ve grown accustomed to her presence." https://t.co/R2ts738Zo5
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) July 19, 2021
I LOVE THIS STORY, it’s a romance! https://t.co/YlxVFYqpWb
— Courtney Milan 🦖 (@courtneymilan) July 21, 2021
"When offered hand sanitizer, I drank it straight. The people in the streets spoke of social distances and curfews as they backed away from me. I pitied them, all muzzled like dogs. I prefer cats."#HappyBirthdayHemingwayhttps://t.co/RF9Wmt0KK8
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) July 21, 2021
Throughly enjoyed my two weeks away. I’ve spent it reading Rabelais in the sunshine & here are 37 euphemisms for the penis taken from Sir Thomas Urquhart’s 1653 translation of Rabelais’s Gargantua & Pantagruel. Enjoy! X
(Music: Penis Song by Macklemore) pic.twitter.com/pgK4J5oYhJ
— Whores of Yore (@WhoresofYore) July 23, 2021
I'm sorry but I will be relentlessly sharing this today.
The European Men’s Beach Volleyball Disciplinary Commission Defends Its Banana Hammock Rule – McSweeney’s Internet Tendency https://t.co/AY3UA55AWl
— 😱 Rooney 😱 (@rooneyrooney1) July 22, 2021
— Classical Studies Memes for Hellenistic Teens (@CSMFHT) July 25, 2021
The Joker said, “if you’re good at something, never do it for free.” While it is nice to be nice & it is great to work hard & to try & be good at whatever you do, but do not do that shit for free, people! Know your worth… and then add tax.
— Kate Lister (@k8_lister) July 24, 2021
— Wendy S. Delmater (@safewrite) July 25, 2021
It’s been an honour commentating the gymnastics today. pic.twitter.com/ZaBeoNRkNi
— Joe Tracini (@joetracini) July 24, 2021
Love this graphic posted on our Discord by @LizTicknor. True with writers as much as it is for artists? pic.twitter.com/L6Lmuacuk9
— Apex Magazine (@apexmag) July 26, 2021
wtf am I supposed to do w this information pic.twitter.com/DY5LxaZCQQ
— Logan Guntzelman (@adirtyguntz) July 25, 2021
"Take the function of Mary. Take the function of John. Does Mary remember who she was before John?"https://t.co/QALqZEnzcf
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) July 26, 2021
If anyone cares to know how I feel this week, please see my humor piece from @mcsweeneys. Thank you. https://t.co/ptIU7tKqs7
— Rachel Mans McKenny (@rmmckenny) July 27, 2021
This is the most perfect thing I've read in weeks and if I could go to a restaurant right now this would definitely be me https://t.co/w8ZBOQUuCx
— Miranda Murphy (@murphymiranda) July 30, 2021
— ted lasso gifs (@tedlassogifs) August 2, 2021
greatest volley in the history of the world pic.twitter.com/TedE0vs03M
— YS (@NYinLA2121) August 2, 2021
Being a writer is 20% Googling certain words to make sure they mean what you think they mean, 10% looking up baby names, 15% removing the word "just" from your MS, and 55% cleaning your house so you don't actually have to write.
— Ashley Reisinger is at 90K (@Awritesinger) August 1, 2021
— Midwest vs. Everybody (@midwestern_ope) August 3, 2021
I made a comic about the science and psychology of why it's so hard to take a compliment https://t.co/YZA7Q2evs0
— The Oatmeal (@Oatmeal) August 3, 2021
Wise words from #catfishcooley that someone made into a nice gif. https://t.co/eatlULkWfI pic.twitter.com/Y07mw8bi9b
— WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme) August 5, 2021
"I see that your right breast is glowing red like molten steel out of a blacksmith’s forge. That’s what we in the industry call a 'full-blown infection.' It hurts like a B-word, but that’ll only last seven weeks, tops."https://t.co/DXsP3xg7ku
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) August 5, 2021
The Erotic Alphabet of Joseph Apoux (19th Century)https://t.co/CQV92IrD9T pic.twitter.com/j64flkQgYu
— Whores of Yore (@WhoresofYore) April 19, 2017
"Jobs aren’t for financially sustaining you—they’re for financially sustaining us."@mcsweeneys coming in hot with the hard truths.https://t.co/9PdcMLAF5b
— Derek Kinsman 🇨🇦 (@derekkinsman) August 5, 2021
Woman Puts Off Going To Doctor Until Disease Bad Enough For Him To Believe Her https://t.co/IyLq7W4K4y pic.twitter.com/2CpWTEBZ7A
— The Onion (@TheOnion) August 9, 2021
Oh man. Just got the new fonts. Instead of bitching like I want to, I am just going to share my favorite McSweeney's piece ever. https://t.co/Cgac2i3wCd
— Jennifer Melton (@_jennifermelton) August 12, 2021
Sometimes – maybe once a century or so – a couple of writers come along who can merely describe, repeatedly, a box and its pinchy contents, and do it in a way that absolutely SLAYS. @felipetmedinaa and @TayKayPhillips are those writers. https://t.co/a3pqSKWD9D
— Audrey Burges (@Audrey_Burges) August 12, 2021
"My eyes eventually open. I’m in a train car. I’m sitting across from two kids. One is a nerd, and the other one is a nerd that is also poor. They are dressed in bathrobes." https://t.co/iMt1unNHBs
— Timothy McSweeney (@mcsweeneys) August 13, 2021
— Classical Studies Memes for Hellenistic Teens (@CSMFHT) August 14, 2021
Ladies I will give you my number, just give me a heads up so I can have this bit in the chamber pic.twitter.com/VU8jzx24E2
— FadedNick (@FadedNick) August 15, 2021
robert de niro / robert de far o pic.twitter.com/YjZh344KAu
— david byron queen 🌲 (@byron_queen) August 17, 2021
Me: “I’ll hang these bananas out of the way”
Bananas: THE HELL YOU WILL pic.twitter.com/vDYvBGPZwq
— Audrey Burges (@Audrey_Burges) August 16, 2021
xykademiqz 