Things that feel like they happened ages ago, but were actually relatively recent: 

• Last time my mom visited (last summer, feels like an eon ago)
• One particular paper of mine that came out in 2014, yet seems like it’s been out for a decade. Even in 2015, it already felt like it had been out for a long, long time.
• A conference in the UK (was three weeks ago, it feels like last year)

Things that feel like they happened recently, but actually did ages ago: 

• Students  graduating. Most seem to remain present, at least in my mind, for quite a while past their graduation date. I only realize that a student has been out in the world for a long time when I ask, “Who remembers X?” in a group meeting and it turns out that not a single current group member has actually overlapped with X.
• Two papers of mine that I feel were just published yesterday, but they actually came out in 2015.
• The latest renewal of my big bread-and-butter grant. In fact, I need to write the next renewal proposal early in the next calendar year.
• I’ve been out of grad school for 13 years — I feel like I only just graduated. I still feel like a total science noob. When I look at my CV, it feels like it belongs to someone else.

Things that feel like they take foreeeeevah, but actually don’t: 

• Sorting socks (most hated chore ever)
• Emptying the dishwasher (second most hated chore ever, but one that is undertaken daily… So maybe it is the most hated chore ever)
• The first 15 min of my 45-min kickboxing class. The rest flies by.
• Every faculty meeting ever

Things that feel like they last a split second, but actually take a while: 

• Enjoyment of coffee, every day. My liquid soul mate
• Kids growing up. Eldest is a rising senior in high school; Middle Boy is entering 5th grade; Smurf will be a 1st-grader in the fall.
  When did all this happen? How? WTF? No! Waaaaah!